Saying No: A Case Study

Saying No: A Case StudyI met Marcus at a networking event, and we got talking about business and personal lives. Marcus told me that he was feeling really tired he had two children who were teenagers, and he was spending a great deal of his time seeing to their needs and was having no time for himself or for his wife. This was leaving him feeling resentful and stressed, he told me that he wanted to be seen as a “good father” and that meant he couldn’t say no when his kids asked him to do something.

Marcus couldn’t see that he was doing a good job and needed external validation form others to say, “you are a good father.” He had formed the habit of saying yes unconsciously to everything and had become a giver and not a taker.

We discussed in our coaching sessions how he could break this habit and to say yes with positive intention. Marcus looked at ways he could get a win-win, that means that his decisions or changes should not adversely affect those closest to him. He asked himself the question if I win how do I make sure my family win too?

Saying No: A Case Study

Discussions also revolved around making small incremental changes to saying no. He decided that to start he would not stay and watch football practice on alternate weeks, instead he would take his wife for a coffee so that could have time for themselves. This was something they had both wanted for a while and brought them joy and happiness. Marcus had managed to manipulate the situation to give himself time and to make sure his sons were still important to him.

Would you like to create the habit of saying no with positive intent? Life Coaching and NLP can will help you achieve this. Contact me to find out more.

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